farra marie rogers

we have a really long driveway. the girls were all playing + doing their own thing. I randomly sat down on a tiny piece of the pavement to feel the sun. they all made their way over to sit or lay right on top of me. that’s when i snapped this pic. and i felt this overwhelming gratitude with a side of panic. how many more perfect moments like this could i possibly have left? seems so silly to let worry steal that joy away.

I read this thing about a mom literally being a human chair and I was dying because I still am! my girls are five and seven and anytime I am sitting anywhere, they all fight over who gets to be on my lap. when I sit on a stool at our kitchen island, my twins still want to climb on top even tho the stool is tiny and I feel like that can’t be the most comfy option. when i lay with them in bed, i have to be somehow touching everyone even though that’s nearly impossible with three kids and two arms.

Depending on the day, I might feel touched out and be like whyyyy why why. other days, I worry if it’s me and homeschool and all the togetherness that makes them so attached to me at all times. and I worry even more thinking I’m somehow doing the wrong thing or that they won’t learn independence or will never move out of the house and never be ok without me. but I saw something while scrolling that made me smile- if the biggest parenting problem that you have today is that your kids want to be close to you, consider yourself super lucky 🥺

the time will come that they will move on from wanting to be on top of me at every moment. that I’ll reach out to hold their hand and they won’t need it. and I’m sure sometimes- i hope very far in the future- being near me will be the last thing they want.

for now i will savor it even when I’m in desperate need for alone time. for now I’ll soak it in and thank my lucky stars that I am so loved. that my lap and my body brings them peace and comfort. for now I will not worry that it’s somehow ‘wrong’ for them to want to be so close to me. I’ll need the reminder often and maybe you will too ❤️